"Good evening ladies and gentlemen of the radio audience. Here we are, once again, overseas, interviewing and seeing and watching all the famous sites of Europe. Last week we were in Italy, the week before we were in were France. And this week we are in England, glorious England. We are now in the county of Berkshire at the famous Bedside Manor, one of the most fatally ancestral homes of England. There are a crowd of people here and we are fortunate enough to have the owner of the home, and here his is, Norman, the Earl of Prong"

"How do ya do"

"How are you sir?"

"Very pleased to meet you"

"Thank you your lordship, you have certainly a beautiful home here"

"You like it?"

"Yes yes very nice"

"It is lovely isn't it?"

"It's a marvel. All these people what are all these people doing here?"

"Well you see, I'll tell you what. where we have, well where I think I have scored over all the other Earl's is you see. they have nothing to offer except their home, as such and few old tin suits of armour. Where as I have got into the thing thoroughly and we have other attractions. You see when they come out and they've seen the home we set about them"

"Well I see all the attractions your lordship, but would you please tell the radio audience exactly, would you point out, what is that over there for example?"

"Now that is a very interesting idea. I find that takes a lot of money. I probably take more money with that than everything else we've got here" 

"You mean you take money"

"Yes, I'll tell you what that is. On my frequent trips into the west end, into town. I noticed, you probably noticed your self, lots of buildings being pulled down and put up you know, construction and demolition. What I decided to do is,I noticed members of the public stopped and watched this going on and I thought to myself, my goodness me is if they've got time to stop and watch, they're got time to pay. One has to be rather mercenary about these things"

"And you charge these people admission"

"Yes indeed. You see the idea is they can come in one day and watch these bricks being put up and the following day, maybe two days later, a slight exageration, they can come back and see the same bricks being put and taken down again. And they pay a nominal fee, half a crown or something like that. And they can stay all day and drink tea there."

"Do you grow your own produce?"

"Yes I must tell you. Eveything you are eating here, for eample that tea you had just now, those cakes they we all made from our own wheat which we grow here, those brussel sprouts are our own, the cabbages are our own, as a matter of fact, everything that you've actually eaten here is grown on my land. Which is quite an achievement I think if you really think of it that way."

"Scuse me, that load of cabbages from Covent Garden your lordship"

"Oh um not now"

"Yes eh thank you. Earl, Earl Norman Sir"

"Man is a fool, where were we, I'm awfully sorry"

"The apparel, all the relics and costumes that I have seen inside the building. Could you tell me what they are"

"Ah ha Yes I can as a matter of fact I have a lot of things like that. I mean I have some original suits of armour. One that was worn by the Black Prince"

"Really"

"Yes, he wore that. And eh, he died in it, I'm not sure but he did wear it. These things over here, you saw these earlier. These things were actually worn by Elizabeth 1st"

"Really"

"Yes"

"Where did she wear them"

"I don't know exactly where she wore them. Probably in court, I should think or on her, well somewhere around you know. It's rather difficult to try and place these things but I don't really know what they are. But I do happen to know, I took them into town to be valued they are worth a considerable sum"

"Thank you Earl. And now Earl, um, could you tell me about yourself. What is your full family name Sir"

"Well my family name is Prong. The first Earl of Prong came over with the Conqueror for the day you know and I decided to stay for a while and em, we've been here ever since."

"That's just remarkable"

"Excuse me,  eh Norman, sorry Sir, don't sign anything Norman I mean, you know don't get carried away. No no I'm sorry Sir, excuse me but the Earl is rather apt to sign and I don't want it to get into, you know, undesirable hands. His signature bandied about"

"Who are you sir?"

"I'm his agent, I'm his agent. No one to talk about now but eh, see you later Norman"

"Yes, one has to have one's affairs handled by such a man. I've not much of a mind for money"

"Well Earl is there anything else you would like to say. This is going all over America and I'm sure America is very interested"

"Well may I plug my latest record. As a matter of fact I've made a record, I've made a jolly good record and I hope it will become a best seller in America what"

"Well I'd like to wish you all the best luck with your record"

"Thank you very much indeed"

"Norman Earl of Prung"

"Prong"

"And here it is"

I said doodle up a dongde
Get her jiving and arriving
Jolly rocking weather

I'm a gamblinger rock around castle
A gamblinger just a hard de da da
I love to roll with lava doh
They call the Earl creole
One O'Clock
Two O'Clock
Three O'Clock
Four  O'Clock
Time for a rocking queue

I say lets go, lets jump like mad
Rock me baby oh I got the big big bad
Rock with the peasants
And roll with the peasants
I love to feel their beat 
In my country seat
Oh rock rock do rock!




















